Helensburgh

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Helensburgh, one might presume, was once a burgh presided over and owned by someone called Helen. Which isn't a great name if you have the wherewithal to hold so much responsibility or land. It somehow conjures up images of a wee woman in pink fluffy slippers and a dressing gown in much the same way that Senga's Toon or Jessieburgh might, both being towns that do not, as far as I am aware, exist. So, if our assumption is correct, just who the heck was Helen?
Well, far be it for me to bore you with facts, but let's just say her name was Helen Sutherland, presumed mother of the twenty-fifth laird of Colquhoun who, in 1802, seems to have owned all of the town. So there. But let us not dwell on this for too long because, to be perfectly frank with you, it bores the pants off me, and when your pants are bored there's not a lot you can do. (Does anyone know how to cheer up bored pants? Maybe a joke or something?)
Anyway, pants aside, what makes the laird's toon worth a visit? Well, there's a house that sits on a hill, and some guy affectionately known as Chuck may have had a hand in its construction. Please form an orderly queue.